Developing the ability to self-reflect is critical to wellbeing in children. Children who are able to self reflect develop an internal focus of control. They will gain in confidence with their ability to assess and to make decisions. They will be less likely to be swayed by external rewards, punishments and threats. Self reflecting children gain a mastery of themselves and are able to express their strengths.
Reflection has two relevant meanings – the act of reflecting or the state of mind.
An image or representation of ones self. We come to know ourselves and so become comfortable in our skin.
Clearly, children of different ages have different capacities. Can a 6 year old self reflect? A 10 year old? A 13 year old? My answer would be emphatically yes, though within the limitations of that stage of development.
Self reflection is a skill that children of all ages need to develop. It’s a skill that will help kids in adulthood in many ways, including developing their self-esteem. Being reflective means being able to think about what you have done, why and if it was effective. Children who can adapt their behaviour after reflecting on what went well or not so well, hold a worthwhile skill.
There are various ways to promote self reflection skills. Writing a journal is a very effective way to start practising this skill. By writing down what they are thinking and feeling, kids will be able to review and contemplate on their actions and reactions. The missing piece of the puzzle is found here. Children need to learn to develop self questioning skills as an important means of developing their reflective skills.
Questions to Develop Self Reflection in Children:
How do I feel?
How did I feel earlier in the day, yesterday or the week before?
Why do I feel this way?
Why did I act in a certain way? What prompted me to act like that?
What does this tell me about myself?
What can I learn from this situation?
If I am in this situation again, what would I do the same and what would I do differently.
Cheers
Daegal Richardson
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