In Stephen Covey’s book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective people one of the habits is entitled, “Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood”. When I first read this it took me a long time to get my head around what he actually meant. It sounded so simple, all I need to do is to listen first and then tell others what I thought. Well I could be no further from the truth with such a basic understanding. This habit has significantly changed the way I communicate and relate to others and although I still often get it wrong, my intention is to try and implement this as often as I can.
Without trying to explain the whole chapter on a very simple level this habit to me really means to listen to people with an open mind and to be truly emphatic. Be willing to be open to new ideas that might challenge your own beliefs and understanding, don’t immediately write someone or something off just because your first instinct tells you to do so.
Since starting Central Coast Sports College there have many times where I have been confronted with some very challenging situations. I have had many people tell me that they love our football program, however, why did we choose such an alternative academic approach? I have had many people tell me that we would not be embraced by the current football establishments, many people tell me that we let families into IFS who have the money and our program is not about identifying the best talent, it is just for people who can afford it.
When you hear criticism like this, although it is at times hard to hear, I do my best to try and really listen to what they are trying to say. What needs does this person have that is not being met and are we able to support them or fulfil their needs? Sometimes we can’t help, however, by not reacting defensively I believe we have built and are continuing to build a culture at IFS that does challenge the status quo. It does force our students, parents, teachers and staff to question the way they have done things in the past and really ask the question, is this the right way to do what they are doing?
This does not always mean that change is good, however, in my opinion it does mean that it is important to be open to reflect on your own practises, the way that you work and how you react to situations and ask yourself at all times, am I doing all I can to be a better person in all that I do?
I will finish with an observation that I recently made when I read a recent article that was written about our college on the Australian Four Four Two website. The article had some comments linked to it by people sharing their opinion about what IFS has to offer. The author of the comment, from my understanding, implied that IFS will let anyone in regardless of their footballing expertise. Whilst I understand this observation and I have had this question raised many times the simple answer is that yes we do let anyone into our college regardless of their technical ability in football. Our process of acceptance into the college is focused on a few key criteria that we establish during our interviews. First and foremost is the student coachable and teachable? Secondly does the child want to be here? Beyond this we identify their attitude to learning and football, their willingness to express themselves and have a desire to be successful not only on the football field but in life as well (do they have a desire to have healthy relationships, do they want to contribute to their community, do they want to be successful academically). Last, can we develop an open and strong relationship with the family who are supportive of what we are trying to achieve?
Our program is a long term program and research tells us if people can do up to 10,000 hours of purposeful practice they can be become a master at anything, so for us when a student comes to us their footballing technical ability is something we can teach and they can master (of course those who come with prior experience have some advantages at the start on the field), the other areas of the child are much more difficult to develop.
Thank you to all the parents, children and staff who continue to put all their energy into creating a wonderful space for our children to be free to express themselves in a safe and caring environment. Have a great weekend!
I have included a photo of Andre doing the vacuuming at our college. Yes this is some of the work we do behind closed doors!
It is for all the reasons that you mentioned Paul that I have put Carson in your college. Yes he dreams of being a professional footballer, and maybe he will and maybe he won’t achieve that dream. But at the very least he is being educated in a way that seems to bring out the best in him and now on a daily basis he is having access to a variety of people who have the same values and beliefs he has been raised on.
I’m sure I’ve said this before and I will say it again. Each male coach, teacher, chef and yourself has had such an incredibly positive and life-changing impact on Carson. Carson has never been happier. Driving home from the game last week he said to me “I am living the dream!” Need I say more.
Karen your words are exactly what we think
Jakob has never been happier and more confident in his collegeing academically and sport
The teachers/coaches/chef have opened up a world to Jakob and us that we are all excited and passionate about
There will always be people who don’t understand or embrace this style of teaching but for us it has been a blessing thank you again to all that have and are making it a success
I have never been more proud of being apart of something.. Even up there with playing for the Matildas! Every piece of the IFS puzzle is being carefully managed and it is awesome to work for someone you truly admire and appreciate. Cheers Paul